I am cranky. I am cranky, sore, tired, nauseous... and cranky again. Today is day 4 post-retrieval and OHSS is making me cranky. I'm a little disappointed that I went from my doctor saying, "don't stress about OHSS, it's extremely rare and we monitor you closely to ensure it doesn't happen," to having a full blown case of OHSS and needing to have fluid drained. Maybe it's just because of my pissy mood, but I feel like this could have been avoided. However, it's in the best interest of the agency and clinic to yield as many eggs as they can; after all, more eggs means a better chance of having at least a few mature eggs as well as more chances for an embryo. I understand that completely, but it's a shame that it comes at the expense of my health. With the exception of my nausea and diarrhea (which was previously constipation), this is probably the most comfortable I have felt since Monday. My bloating has gone down significantly, so I no longer look like I'm pregnant, and the pain/pressure is much less intense. I'm hopeful that by Monday, I'll be in tip top shape and ready to go back to work! (ha, I kid. Let's not get my hopes up.) As I reflect on the whole process, I think perhaps I should have expected to have a brutal case of OHSS - the fact that I was prescribed Dostinex 3 days prior to retrieval should have been a red flag. Dostinex (cabergoline) is frequently given to women to help decrease the bloating associated with OHSS. I don't know that it's done anything aside from making me dizzy though. Luckily Saturday night will be my last dose.
I've recently been in contact with other donors who have had similar experiences. It turns out that OHSS isn't nearly as rare as our doctors convince us that it is and over-stimming donors to yield more eggs seems to be common practice. I just wish I had known these things prior to donating my eggs. As bitter as I sound, I'm not venting to try and deter other individuals from donating their eggs. It's a really interesting experience and it's a beautiful gift to be able to give someone. However, I do recommend that you do your research. Get in touch with other donors if you can. That's the most helpful thing I can suggest. Google can tell you all sorts of things, but nothing compares to the real life experiences of another person. Mind you, every person will have a different experience and our bodies will respond differently to the drugs and the procedure itself, but it's so important to open your eyes to the possible outcomes. Egg donation is incredibly time consuming, invasive and uncomfortable. I haven't been able to work out since I began the IVF drugs due to the fact that they instantly caused me to be bloated and sore. For me, donating my eggs meant completely abandoning the lifestyle I was accustomed to. I have been spending all my time on my couch, dozing on and off throughout the day. I can't work because I'm in such rough shape right now. I can't even grocery shop because my body can't tolerate to be that active. I've learned that even if I wake up and feel pretty decent, walking too far can completely undo that and leave me feeling worse than I did before.
The point that I'm desperately trying to get across here is that if you're even considering egg donation, you need to educate yourself. Do your homework. Read both the good and the bad. I recommend talking to your family doctor or nurse practitioner and seeing what they say about it. From a distance, it's easy to only see the good parts; you're helping a family grow! What better feeling is there than that? You need to understand that egg donation is a business. Agencies want your business! Sure, they care about your wellbeing during the donation process, but you need to realize that your IPs are paying a LOT of good money for you to do this for them. Nothing comes for free. They're footing all of your medical expenses, not to mention everything they'll need to reimburse you for. If you have a job, you need to be prepared to potentially not be able to work for 2, 3, maybe even 4 weeks. It's so unique for each person and how their body tolerates the meds and procedure. There's just a lot to consider when it comes to donation.
Oh, and perhaps most importantly, there's the fact that somewhere out there in the world, you will have a biological child. No, you're not raising and you're not responsible for it financially or in any other regard, but they exist and they are a part of you. When they turn 18, they will have every legal right to get in touch with the agency you worked with to get your name and contact information. Are you prepared for that? Are you willing to explain to future partners or children that you have a person out there who is a part of you, whether you've ever met them or not? Please don't take this lightly. In Canada, you cannot be financially compensated for donation - you can only be reimbursed for your expenses. This isn't the 'get rich quick' scheme some people may think it is. If you want to do this, you have to be willing to put the work into it with no big payoff at the end except for knowing that you have done what you can to help people become parents. You need to be willing to make those sacrifices.
Again, I don't mean to scare anyone by writing this. I just want you to understand all sides of the donation process and what it may mean for you, your health and your future. Did I know that I would feel this awful after donating? No. I honestly had no clue. But if a beautiful baby is born because of this, it will be 1000% worth every injection I jabbed into my belly, every wave of nausea and every ounce of discomfort. And the constant back and forth between constipation and diarrhea.
- AP
Also - if anyone is interested, my boyfriend documented the egg retrieval process with a photo story. It can be found at www.matthewbellphotography.com